I like opening my heart on New Year's. It gives me a sense of closure, and I get to start the new year with clear mind and open eyes. I sometimes, and quite often, say stupid things and probably make people feel uncomfortable, I don't always use the right outlet to do so, and will expect some response - even when I deep in my heart realise none will or should follow.
I did it again, tonight, although I didn't want to, not now, not this way. But I did it and it didn't feel heavy. It felt brilliant - like sitting on the roof last night and shouting at midnight at the street passers by. It felt right, and I felt content. Because 2013 was a terrible, terrible year, but it made me realise things for myself, and it made me feel scared for people again, and it opened my eyes for what was really important during the last four years, what mattered, what I learned and what I shared.
This time it will be different, I promise. This time I start by having spoken out everything that was lodged inside me, and by shouting from the rooftop the things that I want people to remember me with.
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